Inhibitions are feelings of fear or embarrassment that make it difficult for you to behave naturally. Hmm! That definition is loaded with all sorts of crazy story lines. Feelings, fear, embarrassment, naturally! Oh baby, are we going to have some fun with this?

I have been an auctioneer at three charitable functions this season here in Flalaland. My sole reason for being was to extract as much money as possible from more than willing contributors. We all knew why I was here. Why would I worry?

To start you have to have feelings. You have to believe in the good people you are trying to raise money for. Hospice, Go Pink and Safe Space were pretty easy to get psyched up for. The challenge is to get your audience equally as turned on. If you have a great items to auction off you have it made. 

Trips, dinners, sunset cruises all conjure up visions of fun. I was doing one with a fellow auctioneer one time  and we took a simple Mason jar and proclaimed,  it contained “Colorado Air”. We sold it for $500. At a recent one I appeared with shorts with dollar bill designs. We auctioned those of for $600. I even took them off right on he spot. Thankfully for the audience I had another pair on underneath. Commando is not a word we even think of here at Harbour Ridge. 

Was I worried about embarrassment? Not really. What does concern me from time to time is that there will be no bidders. A lot of very generous people bail me out. I guess you have to be somewhat self effacing. I don’t take myself too seriously. I gave my sense of ego up a long time ago. 

I think a key point in the definition of inhibitions is not acting naturally. What does that really mean? Simply said, to me it is responding to occurrences and people in a forthright and truthful fashion. That is not in your face but speaking up rather than sitting in quiet tolerance. You say and think what you feel. If you say something you don’t believe in you know it right away. Over time does that sharp edge of honesty wear down?  Probably and that is sad.

We want everyone to fall in line with adherence to this maxim or that. How do those precepts evolve? First we take an ethos if you will. Let’s call it the way we think things should be. It covers dress, respectability, language, business dealings etc. in a certain setting like a town or an association. These become ingrained over time. It’s a good thing if all agree and bad thing if it stifles innovation and creativity. 

The real tricky part is who is the arbiter of what is appropriate or even better allowable? Should we just let everyone run wild? Should we refuse to accept anything out of the ordinary? Better yet what is considered normal? 

This is more than a fun mental exercise. Our world is changing and changing fast. I am constantly struck by my desire to be accepting of new ideas and at the same time treasuring things I think are worth keeping. This can range from dress code at the club where I live, to laws I think should be upheld or changed and political philosophies that I revere or detest. 

The true acid test is when you come to personalities. You can have a very dynamic and productive policy statement that is presented by a jerk. We are a world of personalities which can further or shoot down a very sensible idea. My wonderful wife often says,”Ted, you have great ideas but sometimes you should have someone a little more subtle put them forward”. Moi? The woman is a genius. 

This whole concept of stars, heroes/heroines, villains being spokespeople, actually makes us totally submissive to image.Their adulation by the masses makes one very reluctant to offer anything to the contrary. 

The state of our educational system is emblematic. Ideally a school environment encourages dialogue and debate with a collaboration somewhere either slightly left or right of center. People are scared shitless by espousing this or that view lest they be shouted down or even worse physically threatened or ostracized. Then we are shocked when an outcast explodes in rage or violence. It’s a crazy world we live in.

Getting back to my original premise is asking how honest you are with yourself and your world? Whoa! That is really heavy duty TTG. It should be. 

Our psyche should be formed by us alone with a little influence from societal norms. We spend a lot of time on self help books and all sorts of analyses. Each in its own way tries to find the real me or you. How did we get so lost in the first place? 

We were at a dinner party one evening in Vail. One of my mucky muck friends was nice enough to ask us along. As the seating was open I decided to go sit with the women of the titans of industry. I had heard enough of their husbands’ wealth and accomplishments. I decided to have some fun.

I told each of the three women that I was giving them $25 million tax free. They had nothing tying them down. No husband. No kids. No family. What would you do? It was like the leashes had been taken off. They spent the next hour or so just letting it rip. Reluctant at first, each one had a bunch of things they wanted to accomplish. Someone they really wanted to be. Very cool.

It is not just those women but all of us who might imagine what if? Let go of our inhibitions or fears.

Follow a dark alley that may not be so  financially rewarding but deep down be so relevant and satisfying. No inhibitions. What a beautiful thing! Come on in. The water is fine. 

As always

Ted The Great 

Factoids:

Marketdata estimates that the self-improvement market in the U.S. was worth $13.4 billion in 2022. The market bounced back about 24% in two years, fueled by growth in personal coaching services, self-help books and audiobooks, and self-help apps.

Good inhibitions. Not hitting someone who annoys you. Trying to hit the golf ball too hard. Not inhaling every piece of food at a buffet. Controlling one’s impulses.

Bad Inhibitions.  Why is it when we have a few drinks in us we are brilliant, suave, and without guard rails? 

Walter Mittys.  noun,plural an ordinary, timid person who is given to adventurous and self-aggrandizing daydreams or secret plans as a way of glamorizing a humdrum life.

It is reported that ninety-six percent of adults daydream every day, with daydreams making up about half of the average person’s thoughts. It is all very normal.  Make them come true.