These days I am search of a rare object. Class! Being classy means acting with grace, respect, humility and self control. You are calm and discreet. Kindness and authenticity. Yikes! Know anyone? That’s a tough one. 

Class and elegance are closely related but class is a timeless dignity as to  how you act but elegance is a subtle sophistication in how you present yourself. You walk in the room like James Bond but you act like Mother Theresa. Try pulling that off. 

Narcissism seems to be a transmittable disease these days. Maybe RFK could come with a vaccine. Probably not, because he’d say the meds change one’s personality. Why would we ever want to do that?  

 But behind this mask of extreme confidence, they are not sure of their self-worth and are easily upset by the slightest criticism. People with narcissistic personality disorder may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they’re not given the special favors or admiration that they believe they deserve. They may find their relationships troubled and unfulfilling, and other people may not enjoy being around them. 

These last two paragraphs I plagiarized. I am not that smart. But they are worth thinking about. 

Have you ever seen somebody with money or power berate a waiter or someone behind a reception desk? Do you know who I am? No, and I really don’t give a crap. I will have your job! The classic is playing golf with a caddy. Crappy shot? Of course it was his fault not yours. He handed you the wrong club or read the putt wrong. That isn’t just being rude. It is the height of insecurity. Making a lesser person feel even worse. Good for you.

They have an unreasonable sense of self importance and need constant admiration and fawning. They feel they deserve special treatment. They want the best of everything and constantly compare themselves to others. They become impatient with staff and lose it when someone criticizes them. 

Is it just me or is this becoming pervasive in so many walks of life. Government? You can be president, senator, rep or cabinet official. You are squired around and doted on. You are unapproachable unless it is on your terms. Wait! Who do they work for? 

Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental health condition in which people have an unreasonably high sense of their own importance. They need and seek too much attention and want people to admire them. People with this disorder may lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others.

CEOS and veeps in corporate suites. Just tell me the good stuff or you are fired. Sports people ? Celebrities? I want only green M and M’s in my dressing room. I will do interviews when I want. I want to be your idol but don’t dare invade my privacy. It is beyond interesting that we not only accept it but want that behavior as a consuming public. Probably would be a great study of human nature an failings. 

If you are classy you are kind, approachable and even humble. You have an authenticity that is palpable. Dolly Parton just died. Does she fit the bill? Never forgot where she came from. She knew who she was and was not afraid to show it. 

I hope I am not overplaying it when I say maybe that is what is missing today. We all have different points view. What if we really listened to people? Not just polite but really trying to understand. What if we were empathetic? I can’t experience your pain but
I can picture it. People really do have crappy lives and huge personal problems. Do you just blow them off? Sorry for your loss but I have things to do. Really interesting stuff. 

Is it silly to aspire to this high level? I hope not. I am one of the worst offenders but it doesn’t mean one settles into being a jerk forever. Work in progress and that is the point. We are all guilty in one manner or another. Maybe a lot of us have just given up? Sad.

Me? I am gong to try to be authentic.

I am going to try not to interrupt. Set my ham radio to receive and not just transmit. I have specific thoughts and beliefs but it does not mean I don’t have a lot to learn. Maybe I just say thank you for all the numbers things people do for me. Perhaps not God’s gift to the music world as the saying goes. Work in progress, right to the end.

As always 

Ted The Great  

Factoids:

Wealth breeds contempt. You think you got there by your brains and not luck. As you have more you want to amp it up. The higher and higher you go the more detached you become from the real world. From what really makes this world tick. 

Classy People

Mother Theresa..top of the list. 

Pope Leo…

Adam Scott and Justin Rose…pro golfers. 

George Herbert Walker and Barbara Bush

Tom Hanks

Jimmy and Rosanne Carter

Kate Middleton

Princess Di

Warren Buffett

MY MOM!

I am sure there are more but I really have to think. Decent, honest and humble probably were my favorite attributes. Interesting as I look online everyone was great because the were beautiful or well dressed. Hmmm.